Sardarji Jokes

Editor’s Note: These jokes should be taken in a positive spirit, these are not meant to hurt the feelings of any community. Most of these jokes are also narrated by the Sikhs across the border and the main character is always a “Musla”. Sikhs are wonderful people. It will not be out of context to refer to a Comment written by a visitor of this website from Canada:-
“In his autobiography, Sir Zafar Ullah Khan has quoted Winston Churchill describing Sikhs as the “most delightful people” from India. Churchill made the remark after appearing before a Parliamentary Commission on political reforms in British India during 1930’s.”

Difference between Radio and Newspaper?

Sardar Jee ki Pitaye (Thrashing)

Last Wish of a Sardar Jee

Sardarji buys Cheap Oranges

Sardar Jee and an Angraiz in a Drowning Ship 

Sardarji asks, ” Who will get the prize in the race?” 

Sardarji and his Multi Lingual Parrot

Sardar Jee’s Punjabi Computer

Opinion of Two Doctors about a Limping Sardarji

Sardar Jee and a Lion

Sardarji Runs 8 KMs a Day to Lose Weight

Teacher Asks Sardarji to Translate a Sentence in Punjabi

Sardar Jee Travels in Air India

Sardarji Asks His Wife to Bring Water

A Sardar Jee Gave a Stolen Gold Necklace to His Fiance 

70 Years Old Sardarji (to wife): “Mein teray lei chan taray tore sakna waan”

Two Sardarjis Find Bombs in a Field  

A Long Queue Outside a Clinic

A Sardarji Tries to Taste a Tissue Paper at a Marriage Party

Sardar Jee’s Teacher Fell in Love with Him

Sardarji’s Wife Admonishes Her Little Son

Sardar Jee and His Math Teacher

A Sardarni Flies to Chandigarh
A plane is on its way to Chandigarh, when Gurpreet in economy class gets up, and moves to the first class section and sits down. The flight attendant tells Gurpreet that she paid for economy class, and that she will have to sit in the back.
Gurpreet replies, “I’m Sardarni, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Chandigarh and I’m staying right here.”
The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the co-pilot who goes back to Gurpreet and asks her to return to her seat in the economy class.
Gurpreet replies, “I’m Sardarni, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Chandigarh and I’m staying right here.”
The co-pilot reports the matter to the pilot. The pilot says, “You say she is a sardarni? I’ll handle this; I’m married to a sardarni. I speak sardar’s language.”
He goes back to Gurpreet and whispers in her ear, and she says, “Oh, I’m sorry.” and gets up and goes back to her seat in the economy class.
The amazed co-pilot asked, “What did you say to make her move without any fuss?”
“I told her, First class isn’t going to Chandigarh.”

Sardarji was Staring at a Girl

Sardarji Wants His Wife to Grow a Beard
A Sardar jee converted to Islam. One day he started beating his wife.
A neighbor asked,  “Why are you beating your wife?”
Sardar: “I asked her to grow beard but she doesn’t agree.”
Neighbour:  “How can a woman grow beard?”
Sardar: “ Minoo patta aye, per eh irrada tay karay, aidha vee sawaab milda aye.”

Sardar Jee and His Old Wife

Sardarji Got Involved in a Car Accident

Sardar Jee Explains Inflation to His Wife
Wife: “What is inflation?”
Sardar Jee: “When we got married, you were 36-24-36 but now you are 48-38-48. You have everything more than you had before.”
Wife: “So?”
Sardar Jee: ” Despite that your value is less than before. That’s what inflation is!”

Two Sardars Encounter a Lion
Two Sardars were in a forest, when a lion came roaring towards them. One of them threw red chilly powder into its eyes, and ran. Second one stayed unmoved.
When asked why did he not run, the second Sardar said: “Why should I run? It were you who threw the chillies.”

Sardar Jee’s Friend Hits Him With a Shoe
A Sardar Jee’s friend hits him with a shoe.
Sardar: “Tum nay yeh joota ghussay say mara ya mazaaq say?”
Friend: “Ghussay say.”
Sardar: “Acha hai werna mein essa mazaaq bardaasht nahi karta.”

Laments of a Sardarji’s Widow

English Translation:
When a Sardar Jee died in Indian Punjab, his wife started lamenting: ” Way tu othay tur gaya, jithay na diva na batti; Way tu othay tur gaya, jithay na manji na pirhi; Way tu othay tur gaya, jithay na aata na roti.”
Her little son asked her; “Baybay, kidray Abaa Pakistan tay nahin tur gaya?”

Sardar Jee Wanted to Rob a Bank

Sardar Jee Experiments on a Cockroach
Sardar jee was attending a class where cockroaches were being dissected.
He cuts one leg of a cockroach and says,”Chal.”  It walks.
He cuts its 2nd and 3rd legs and said, “Chal,”  It walks.
He cuts all the legs and said, “Chal.” It didn’t walk.
Finally he wrote the conclusion…… ……
“After all the legs of a cockroach are cut, it becomes deaf.”

Sardarji Goes Out to Eat Pizza

Where was Sardarji Born?
Teacher to Sardar Jee: ” Where were you born?”
Sardar : “In Tiruvanantapuram.”
Teacher : “Spell it?”
Sardar (after thinking): “I think I was born in GOA.”

No Great Men Born in Sardar Jee’s Village
One tourist from U.S.A. asked Sardar: “Any great man born in this village?”
Sardar: “No sir, only small babies are born in our village.”

Sardarji’s  Explanation of an Idiot
Son: “What is an idiot?”
Sardar Jee: “An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can”t understand him. Do you understand me?”
Son: “No.

A Sardar Jee Obtains Car Loan
A Sardar jee obtained a Car Loan from a bank, and bought a car. After a couple of months, he could not pay the monthly loan installments, and the bank repossessed the car. He informed all his friends about bank loan and repossession.
Now, all his smart friends are applying for Marriage Loans!
Wow, they are smart !

Sardar Jee Was a Victim of Racism
A customer asked the clerk of a store in Virginia, USA, “In what aisle could I find  Sarson ka Tel ( Mustard Oil)?”
The clerk says “Are you a Sikh”?
The guy, clearly offended, says, “Yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian Olive Oil, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?”
The clerk said, “No, I probably wouldn’t.”
The guy says, “Well then I asked for Sarson ka Tel, why did you say I am a Sikh?”
The clerk replied, “Because you’re in a Liquor Store.”

Immigrant Sardarji Gets Sick
An immigrant Sardar Jee in USA goes to a doctor and says, “Doctor, I feel terrible.”
After examining the patient thoroughly, the doctor says, “Put your baby’s ‘potty’ and urine in a bucket, throw in a dead fish and some rotting vegetables. Let them remain there for 10 days, then put a towel over your head and inhale the vapours for 15 minutes every morning.”
The man does this and goes back to the doctor and says: “Doc, I feel wonderful. What was wrong with me?”
“You were Homesick” says the doc.

Sardar Jee Becomes a Catholic
Each Friday night Sardar jee would cook a tandoori chicken and some meat kebabs in his outdoor BBQ grill. All of his neighbors were strict Catholics and they were forbidden from eating chicken and meat on a Friday.
The aroma from the BBQ was causing such a problem for them that they talked to their Priest who persuaded Sardar jee to become a Catholic. After several classes and much study, Sardar jee attended Mass… And as the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said, “You were born a Sikh, and raised as a Sikh, but from now, you are a Catholic.”
Sardar jee’s neighbors were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived. Again the aroma of tandoori chicken and meat kebabs filled the neighborhood. The Priest was called immediately by the neighbors and, as he rushed into Sardar jee’s backyard and prepared to scold him, he stopped and watched in amazement.
There stood Sardar jee, carefully sprinkling holy water over the grilling meats and chanted: “Oye, you were born a chicken, and you were born a lamb, you were raised as a chicken and you were raised as a lamb but now onwards you are a potato and you are a tomato.”

What Comes First? Chicken or Egg?
Sardar jee found the answer to the most difficult question ever. What will come first, Chicken or egg?
“O Yaar, what ever you order first, will come first.”

Sardarji Uses the Word ‘Thand’ (Cold) in a Sentence 

A Sardar Jee Sat On a Double-decker Bus in London

Teacher asks a Sardarji; “Kamyabi Kiss Kay Qadam Choomti Hai?” 

Sardarji Jumps into a Swimming Pool

 

Related Page:
Best Jokes

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